For nobody else, gave me a thrill - with all your faults, i love you still.
It had to be you, wonderful you, it had to be you.
{/
Wednesday, September 29, 2010( 8:21 PM)
i don't give a damn if you know this or not
but you suck
no, to some people, i know they think you're totally amazing,
an awesome friend, THE PERSON to be with
well, that might as well be your facade you try to con people into believing
well, newsflash:
that would be SO LAST CENTURY
anyway, i don't think we are actually classified as friends, to begin with
maybe more of acquaintance?
because half the time, i get the feeling that you're trying to stab me in my face with a plastic fork
the other half, i figured you're trying to gossip behind my back so desperately that you got it written all over that face of yours
c'mon, when you're figuring out how to flirt your ass into the "cool" crowd, despising (not even willing to give the initial look) the "not-so-cool" people
other people out there are watching you.
being that silent killer, slicing you into your inner core
talking behind your back.
yeah, so what if you're (quote) "loyal" to your friends,
people will think you're just being their dog.
i would like to emphasize that I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING against you
it's more of you to me.
i'm not guessing.
you went directly in-your-face-i-hate-your-guts-get-the-f**k-out-of-my-view to me
i'm not as clueless as you hope i would be.
i'm sorry if it burns.
strangely, you remind me of a christmas turkey.
no, don't get me wrong, i'm not like some people that discriminate people because of their size
i was thinking that you should have a bright red apple stuffed into that snotty mouth of yours,
baked till golden brown
and allow people to feed upon you helpless to their heart's desire
well, at least make yourself do something that's worth something
{/
Sunday, September 26, 2010( 5:11 PM)
YOU SUCK SO MUCH
STRAWS THINK YOU'RE ANNOYING
LOLLIPOPS HATE YOUR EXISTENCE
ANTEATERS HOPE YOU WERE DEAD
and i wished you never entered my life (:
{/
Tuesday, September 21, 2010( 2:15 PM)
today is the ultimate slack day ever
i tried to study last night, but i couldn't
my mum told me to sleep on it,
that maybe today will be a better day
nah, today's actually worse
she said maybe i'm just too overwhelmed by the stress that i'm not focused
maybe, but i know that isn't the real reason
my mind is constantly being bombarded with silly and nonsensical ideas
that i thought maybe having it expressed out in words would be better
hope that i'd be able to study productively later
i don't know what i'm really expecting
but maybe i should have noticed this vicious cycle all along
that it has always been there
if it happened once, fine then,
maybe i was not to blame
but it happened, what, every single time
am i an idiot or something?
because right now, i feel like one
maybe i'm just not so good at expression and hurt every one
well then, i'm sorry
okay?
if it actually make things better
{/i shall try to compose a post during the span of one song
Wednesday, September 8, 2010( 12:03 PM)
(okay here goes, it's september by daughtry)
i've been wondering what life is all about
since, after only God knows how long, we're going to be urns or graves
so whats the use of fighting so hard for something when you can have it for eternity?
okay, maybe i'm just pessimistic, but it's true, isn't it?
deep down, in the deepest corner of every heart,
all this is true
of course, this is one thing i still am unwilling to believe
but believe it or not, regarding its presence or not
it is still there and nothing can change it
so, as what the speaking brothers or sister eehan said,
why not lets just fight for something eternal?
running for the race and knowing what the end goal is
because everyone needs a goal to be motivated to carry on in this course
(second round of the same song)
anyway, thats not my point
my point is
so what if we enjoy now?
will we get to enjoy this forever?
what will material comfort do to us?
how will material comfort comfort us?
in a way, it's just a temporary comfort
something that we need for only a short time
one hour? day? week? month?
but regardless how long, it's not forever
{/how it feels like to wait
Tuesday, September 7, 2010( 8:59 PM)
waiting is one of the worst feelings to ever experience
if waiting for a text reply is long and miserable, how about awaiting death to creep up to you?
to slowly devour your every second because who knows if you may be the next in line up the obituary.
or to wait for your loved ones to reply that damn call
i know my mum knows what i mean, she'll spam my brother and me with calls and texts that says no more than "call me" almost every single day.
serious
sometimes, waiting seems to train our sense of endurance
waiting for the things you always wanted
but other times, waiting just sucks to the core
anticipating something to happen, but it didn't, or it screwed up in the end
like how i was thinking about how i was going to enjoy pizza for dinner tonight,
but when i got home, my mum bought chicken rice (with the disgusting skin still on!)
because my brother did not want to make the phone call
he used to claim that he was a vampire.
he's more like an anti-social freak that is unwilling to talk on the phone to any other individual other than his FEMALE friends
but that doesn't bother me.
he's predictable and i like him for that (:
xinrui is always saying how she would confess to HIM but she didn't, in the end
the scenario is always the same
she chickened out at the last second, after waiting, visualizing, rehearsing the moment in her head more than a thousand times
i wonder how it feels like to confess
how it feels like as the suspense is being built up
one bit by one bit, every molecule in your body vibrating to the same thought
tell.him.the.truth.
anyways, personally, i can't stand suspense.
but, ironically, i love reading stories bound together by mystery and trailer.
three-quarter of the time, i'd just flip to the back, browse a little of the ending
after being satisfied with what i know, i' then continue my journey through the maze, secretly feeling a strange surge of elation because i know what's in stall for me at the end
one-quarter of the time, if i'm THAT bored, i'd goggle a certain movie, know the story, then watch the movie, or the other way around
i NEED to know things instantly
i can't help it
sometimes i can wait
sometimes i can't
because my imagination can take me to different places, exploring the different and absurd possibilities
so, when will i know the truth?
{/how deep the Father's love for us
Thursday, June 17, 2010( 11:57 AM)
How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure
How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory
Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocking voice,
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished
I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection
Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom
{/
Tuesday, March 30, 2010( 9:28 PM)
it's been forever since i last posted a post
thats because i see no reason to do so
well, now i'm just too bored with nothing to d0
and so many things had happened over the past few months
there have been so many ups and downs like a crazy roller coaster ride
some moments i hope to reminisce, but some are better kept tucked away
now, i'm happily married to OLI, struggling to pass and do well with the giant-like subjects
probably not as happy as i hope but i hope i'd survive.
as hazel said, we're all in this together, i hope we'd all graduate with flying colors and go to the institute we've always dream about